Butler Giraudo & Meister
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3 tips for fathers going through a divorce

Although divorce is a difficult time for both mothers and fathers, it can be particularly difficult on fathers. This is due to the fact that mothers are sometimes favored in divorce hearings and procedures for a variety of reasons.

For example, judges may consider a mother the more natural caretaker for children. This can seriously impact the chances a father has to gain equal parenting time. Fathers' rights is an area of divorce and family law that is becoming increasingly important. If you are a father facing a divorce, take note of the following three tips that can help you as you move through the process:

1. Aim to keep control over parenting decisions

When you and your former spouse are unable to find common ground on parenting issues as you move through the divorce process, you will likely have to turn to the courts and a family law judge to make these decisions. As a father, that may leave you disproportionately penalized. One way you can ensure that you get equitable parenting time is by striving to keep control over the decision-making regarding parenting choices. You can do this by developing a shared parenting plan that you and your former spouse present to the court.

2. Avoid retaliation and emotional outbursts

Divorce is an emotionally contentious time, and it can be tempting to want to lash out at your ex. However, these outbursts and attempts at retaliation often backfire. It is best for you to remain as neutral as possible in the face of provocations by your ex. You should especially avoid bad-mouthing your children's mother in front of them. Self-control, as you move through your divorce, will pay dividends in the long run. Keep your personal anger out of the negotiation process as much as possible and focus on your objectives in terms of your children and your post-divorce future.

3. Establish a support network

Men are often encouraged to put on a brave, impassive front in the face of divorce, but this can cause you an untold amount of stress. Do not be afraid to seek out a trusted support network. There are many resources available specifically for fathers going through divorce. In addition, you should determine the family and friends you can reliably depend upon to be on your side through the process. A stable support network can help you successfully navigate the emotional challenges of divorce.

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